Countdown to Cabo!
||The official Countdown to Cabo has begun for the RRN. The Tour this year has been dubbed "The 2003 Sheets to the Wind Tour - Unfurled in Cabo".
Below is an urgent communique just received by the RRN...
The Governor Of
Baja California, Mexico
April 1, 2003
Lord Admiral Blackwood, HMFIC
Royal Runnamok Navy Headquarters
Desert Fleet Headquarters
My Dearest, Dearest Friend Lord Admiral Blackwood,
I do hope that this letter of extreme friendship and respect finds you in good health and fortune. By the way, did you receive the gold shipment that I sent to you last year? I do hope that the extortion amount will not be higher this year, as the local police have not been making their quotas lately.
My command officers have informed me that the world famous RRN has intentions of holding its 2003 Tour of Battle off the coast of Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, the month of April in the Year of Our Lord, Two Thousand and Three.
With past experiences of your grand navy already in the history books of Mexico, it will come as to no surprise to you and your fine officers, that the government of Mexico has no intentions of disapproving your request for absolute secrecy during your stay in our fine Port of Cabo San Lucas, Mexico. Also, the Mexican Attorney General has decided not to file charges against you or your fine officers and seamen, for the 2002 Tour of Battle held in the sleepy town of Puerto Vallarta. By the way, as per your request, the paternity suit against one Senor Davee aka Master Bates has been dropped.
I, the Governor, Don Diego de Zorro of La Mancha II , do hereby grant all rights and privileges to your fine Officers, Seamen and Plebes during said naval exercises and planned shore leave. However, the Mayor of Cabo San Lucas, the Honorable Pedro Juantontomato VI, has asked that you please refrain from bringing in the glowing trinkets, fascinating baubles, Naval Tattoos and Runnamok Apparel that caused the near destruction of the town's economy on your last visit.
As you are probably aware, your officers introduced many devices, which captured the fancy of everyone, but soon after your crew departed Cabo San Lucas, boredom set in and the riots started. Cabo San Lucas was nothing but burned out restaurants, silent night clubs and empty hotels. They have since rebuilt those establishments but Mayor Juantontomato is afraid his small town may suffer the same consequences again.
Our glasses are raised high in salute and anticipation of the arrival of the Royal Runnamok Navy. May your stay in Cabo San Lucas be fruitful and memorable.
Governor Don Diego de Zorro of La Mancha, II
cc: President George W. Bush
President Vicente Fox
Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth
Reverend Jessie Jackson