- "It is far easier to be forgiven than it is to ask permission"
- "A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail. A good friend is one
who is in jail with you and says: Man, that was fuckin' awesome!"
- "The liver is evil and must be punished!"
- "Don't tell me how rocky the sea is, just bring in the ship."
- "When the distance between the boat and the dock exceeds the length of your body, you will be wet. "
- "When the draught of your vessel exceeds the water's depth, you are most assuredly aground. "
- "If you are not an experienced sailor, NO friggin with the riggin!"
- "Old Sailors never die, they just get a little dinghy."
- "A boat's nothing but a hole in the water you keep throwing money into."
- "If you don't want to share it, don't bring it home."
- "Hold my beer and watch this!"
~ Montanan's famous last words
- "Well what did I do to piss you off this time, baby?"
- "Don't let Bligh go to sleep. When he does, something always goes wrong!"
- "Always carry extra lug bolts when traveling in Mexico."
- "A flogged crew is a happy crew."
- "What anchor?"
- "Would you like a tattoo with that?"
- "These things stick anywhere."
- "I'll trade you this glowie for that tray of jello shots..."
- "Cover charge?!?! We don't pay no stinkin' cover charge!"
- "We ARE the entertainment!"
- "You want us to take of your wives?!?"
- "Like a good seaman I shall follow the grog."